Recently it's getting more and more apparent to me that my body is aging. I never paid too much attention to this notion in the past and really just took it all for granted. But lately I've started to notice indications of aging starting with my vision.
About a month or so ago, I started noticing what looked like dirt floating around in my right eye. Just as I would in the past, I rinsed out my right eye with lukewarm running water. This time, I couldn't seem to flush it out with this method. I then told my wife and she suggested that I go see the eye doctor about it, which was a coincidence since I hadn't gone to the eye doctor for several years prior.
At the doctors' office, I learned that this foreign object debris (or fob as they referred to it in the military) is called "floaters" which are actually inside the ball of the eyes. They are natural gelatin that holds the retina to the back of our eyes and it is common that some pieces detach through aging. The doctor asked me how many I'm seeing and I told him only one (that I can see). He said that it was normal at my age and not be concerned but to let him know if I start seeing more floaters or some dark areas in my vision. I envisioned my eye to pop out of its socket or perhaps develop into Homer Simpson eye as it worsens. I asked him if I was going to live and he just looked at me with the same look most people give when they see someone walking down the street talking to themselves. I took that to mean, "Yes, you crazy lunatic!"
Looking back, I would admit that the notion of getting old started when I was about 18 years old. That was the year that AARP sent me my first membership application. It was addressed to Ms. Samuel Paano and I thought, "Look at that, not only am I old, I also changed gender..." I thought perhaps they made a mistake and delivered it to the wrong house but the more I pondered, the more I realized that it was too uncanny that there would be a female member in the same house that I lived in with the same first and last name as mine. I started to worry and that was the beginning in the decline of my brain cells' generation. Unknowingly, this is when I started aging.
Little by little, events started to develop that would continually increase the rapid decline of my body. One of these events is the day that I stood in front of the mirror after showering and noticed that I had grown hair inside my nose. Okay, I knew that we all have hair in our noses to filter out the dirt as we inhale. What made me notice it during this particular time is that the hair had started to protrude past the opening of my nose. Not really knowing what the protocol is for this type of situation, I took out my nail clipper and started weeding; much like I was trimming the weeds on our lawn with garden shears. I felt relieved only to find my nose hairs had grown back to the same length a week later. Since then, I found myself trimming nose hairs almost on a weekly basis which is about three quarters times more than going to the barber shop to get my hair cut. My nose hairs are growing faster than the hair on my head. As a matter of fact, I'm losing hair on top and gaining it inside my nose. I have then come to the conclusion that my hair might be planted upside down and I suspect that the doctor who delivered me might have overlooked this birth defect which is why it was left uncorrected.
Another recent revelation that brought to light this awareness of aging is that I find myself getting tired quicker. So much so that I find it necessary to take naps during the day, and I am perfectly fine with it! As a matter of fact, I look forward to a good afternoon napping whenever and where ever I am. In some parts of the world, it is customary to nap during the day - I believe they call it "siestas". Sadly this practice is not well adapted here in the United States but perhaps we should. If we did, we probably wouldn't have as many irritated jack asses roaming the streets. I believe that lack of daytime napping cause people to dream up of mass hysteria and panic people with conspiracies about "weapons of mass destruction" from all those "evil doers"; because as we all know that's why we have Batman and Robin!
Now just before I turned 50, I received my AARP membership card in the mail. It was odd receiving it because I didn't send the application in nor did I submit anything online. Somehow, I think AARP is a branch of the FBI or the CIA because they are quite aware of when you're ready to become a member without your knowledge. I saw this as a benefit rather than a travesty of my situation. I can now perhaps take advantage of those senior citizen discounts even at an early age of 50. I can use it in bars and drinking establishments when they ask to see my ID (when I ask for the SC discount, that is). Instead of taking out my driver's license, I can now whip out my AARP card and be served discounted drinks with no hassle.
With this awareness, I have come to learn a great deal about old age. You see, the thing about growing old is that it is both a challenge and an opportunity. Getting old can either be crippling or it can be a good argument for negotiations. I'm reminded of a technique that an old friend of mine used to use. Whenever he received a refusal for any offer, he would just lean over to the person and say gently and without malice, "Now, you know that I'm an old man and my heart isn't quite what it used to be; and if you say 'no' to my offer, well I'm not entirely certain of how my weak heart would take it..." Needless to say, he always got his way.
... And now it's time for my nap so go away! Shut the door on your way out...
